I'm Working On My Lack of Neutral Language

Dear Lord, I never realized how many music venues there are in Asheville until I only had four hours to put together a music calendar. Seriously though, how many shitty Grateful Dead cover bands does one city need? Grow-up, Asheville; get a job, and cut your hair.

On that note, here's some hilarious band lyrics from some Asheville bands. Don't ask me which ones; I've listened to about fifty different bands tonight and most of them are blending together. (Probably because there are too many goddamn folk/ jam band/ roots /douche-bag hippy bands in Asheville). Anyway:

"She's got a face that could move a mountain."
"I know I'm mixing metaphors, but I hope you'll understand / She's like firewood in Florida / She just ain't worth a damn."

Happily, I found two bands I love, Hurrary for Riff Raff and Dark Dark Dark, both of which are playing at Bobo Gallery the same night as the Morrissey show that sold out three fucking months ago. I'll upload some audio when my eyes return to normal.

Also, I would like to mention that anyone who is remotely able should definately come to Guadalupe for "The Luke Webb Vareity Show" on the Saturday, March 7. Rumor has it there may be a stand-up comedy routine involved.